Since the beginning of the human race in Genesis, there is one thing that all humans have a deep sense of requirement. That is control, control of your environment, control of those around you, control of your situations. God made it clear, we are not in control of those things. (Proverbs 16:9, James 4:13~15) Although many have tried and to some extent through brute force accomplished, mostly on the outside, God ultimately is the only one that can control those. You cannot completely control people, nor can you control situations. BUT there is one thing that God did give humans complete control over that not even God can have control over. He gave up this control – that is our self-control. We are completely in control, or can be completely in control, of our self. We constantly give it up to have other things and people to control, and we actually do it willingly. It’s a true paradox. Control, the very thing we demand to have, is the very thing we just hand out to whatever comes our way.
Now hold up, you may say, I have rather good self-control. That guy cut me off the other day and I did not curse at him, or that person irritated me and I just walked away, or that situation was not what I wanted and I stepped back instead of engaging. Those are all good things, but if you even let any of those cause a emotional response or change your mood then you actually lost your self-control. There are only two possible reactions to any situation, one, you control your thoughts and emotions, or two, you let the situation/person control them. (2 Corinthians 10:5) We are to take every thought captive, Every. Single. One. Personally that seems impossible, and I have heard Dan Mohler call this living a “buttonless” life. The fact that if something or someone causes you to react negatively without giving them grace or capturing the thought and letting it give offence to you, you are just letting the situation or person to control how you feel or react, and you have handed control of yourself to them. That is the loss of self-control.
Now I admit, that seems very impossible. Actually it is for someone that is not in Christ. (Romans 6:16) But for someone that is in Christ, its a Fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:23) and as a Christian, expected to obtain (1 Corinthians 9:25) and actually is a very serious thing as Paul, when talking to Felix, convicted him of it. (Acts 24:25)
Now, although its a Fruit of the Spirit, its not something we just “get” when we enter a Covenant relationship with Christ, it something we have to actually work on. (1 Corinthians 9:25) and as Paul puts it, the flesh (Romans 8). I admit that I am nowhere perfect at this, but something the past few years I have been working on. Living “buttonless” is not easy, its a manner of taking the thoughts captive and truly determining why whatever that is bothering me, and if it’s not of Christ, backing down and just letting it be and letting the Holy Spirit instead direct what my response should be. Jesus was the complete example of living in complete self-control. When things happened to Him, His reaction was not of His own emotion, but instead He reacted in grace and understanding of the motive behind the action, not the action its self.
This actually goes much farther than just self-control, it is the core element to obedience and peace. It’s the key ingredient to freedom. First it’s not possible to be in obedience to Christ if you are handing control of yourself to the situations and people around you. (Romans 6:16) If the world around you cannot control you, you then also have peace, because then you are fully dependent on the Holy Spirit to supply everything, (Philippines 4:19) and frees you from worry. (Luke 12:11)
Self-control is the only way to obtain true freedom in Christ. This lies in the fact that freedom is the opposite of controlled. In America, a lot of people would say freedom is the ability to do what you want, but that is not exactly true, the meaning of freedom is – not being controlled or not being in captivity. With the Holy Spirit’s fruit of complete self-control, means you now have the freedom to not have the world control you, not have situations and people control you, and voluntarily choose to follow Christ instead. (1 Peter 2:16, Galatians 5:13) Voluntarily following is not a form of control, we follow Christ because we want to, not because of any law or rule. Is this a requirement for salvation or being a Christian? No, its not, you can choose to give up your freedom. (1 Corinthians 10:29), but it will make you an ineffective Christian, and may put you in disobedience. Being is disobedience, well as in a Covenant standpoint, is not the greatest place to be.
There is a catch to this freedom, and why may Christians are more than willing to give it up and let people, situations, churches and other things take control. That is responsibility. Once free, you are now completely responsible for your thoughts and actions, you cannot pass the buck, saying that something out of your control caused whatever you did. Even though ultimately you have no excuse for not exercising self-control, its easier just to follow an emotion, crowd, belief, or whatever excuse than to own up to it and deal with it. The other thing is work, it’s work to stay in freedom because it’s just easier to follow a rule than to have to actually process what is going on and what the Holy Spirit may have to override, and you may have to do more steps or endure more frustration than if you just lashed out. Also fairness, we as humans demand it to be fair, but to God that is subjective and what may seem unfair to us is not to God. (Ecclesiastes 9:11~12) What seemed to be a small thing to Moses ended up costing him a lot. (Numbers 20:8~12) There is a classic example of someone that lost control of themselves and let the situations take over their mood and emotions and it ended up costing them a lot because they had to own up to their improper response.
Now, do not get me wrong that there are physical reasons where self-control may not be possible, there are such things as hormones’ and mental disorders, neurology and our physical body that sometimes there are things that we cannot completely control, but I am also convinced that the Holy Spirits can heal us from those things and sometimes He brings us to understanding of things like supplements that help up gain control over our physical bodies that can assist in obtaining full self-control. And sometimes this is where grace comes in. As Romans 8 points out, we are still human.
(NASB) 2 Peter 1:5~8 – Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge, and in your knowledge, self-control, and in your self-control, perseverance, and in your perseverance, godliness, and in your godliness, brotherly kindness, and in your brotherly kindness, love. For if these qualities are yours and are increasing, they render you neither useless nor unfruitful in the true knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.
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